GH day 31 – aka ‘Touch Up your Manuscript Day’

Today, is all about touch. Touch (although some might argue taste) is the most personal of the senses. It provides a visceral experience for the reader when they feel what the characters are feeling. How can the reader NOT be drawn into the story?

Touch can be tricky to add into the manuscript. But touch doesn’t have to be the physical feeling under your fingertips. It can be goose bumps up the arm, a light breeze blowing over skin, a warm hand on the center of your back. Remember to use every part of the body for touch!

Obviously in romance, touch is imperative with the couple. Whether you write inspirational romance or erotica, touch is a sense that cannot be ignored. So let’s look at this excerpt one more time with touch added into it.

2013-04-25 11.23.00

TOUCH:
Susanna slid down the rough wall next to the rickety cot and blew out a hard breath, the sound echoing loudly in the small space. She closed her eyes and took shallow breaths through her mouth to stop the rancid air from souring her stomach. How long had she been there? There were no windows in her cell so she had no sense of day or night. Why had they taken her? She was a librarian for God’s sake. She knew nothing about someone named Gabriel Sinclair, yet they kept asking her where he was. This whole thing was a case of mistaken identity. She had to make them see reason.

She gingerly ran her finger over her swollen lip and spit the coppery blood from her mouth while rationally examining her options. She had not seen her kidnappers’ faces. They had worn masks the whole time and ordered her to keep her eyes to the floor when they entered the room. That was a good sign. Maybe they planned to let her go. If they were working so hard for her not to identify them, all was not lost.

The door squeaked as it opened slowly. Susanna tensed but kept her eyes down. She flinched as each step came closer. A pair of military boots came into her line of sight stopping a foot in front of her. She waited, her heart pounding in her ears.

“Look at me.”

She hesitated. Were they testing her? She didn’t recognize this man’s voice. It was deeper than the others with some sort of accent she couldn’t identify.

“I said look at me.”

She raised her head slowly and met his ice-blue eyes. Bile choked her and she swallowed hard. He was not wearing a mask.

If you get a chance, you may want to go back and look at the excerpt when it just had sight examples (GH day 28) versus now.

It definitely makes a difference, doesn’t it? Now I might not use ALL of the examples I have included in the exercise but it creates a 3-D experience for the reader.

Draw them in!

Task #32 – complete sensory overload 😉

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s